It's 2:15am, and the alarm goes off. Time to force myself out of bed to feed the baby. I contemplate the snooze, but he's starting to fidget, and the sooner I get it done, the sooner I can go back to bed.
Since mama's up pumping all night every few hours, I'm on feeding duty. Lucky me.
I turn off the alarm, the Muppets' "Mahna Mahna", I reluctantly sit up, and I force my eyes open. Looking around the room, I stand up, grab the bottle from the 11:30 feeding, and head to the steps.
My objective is simple, add the formula to the bottle I've already measured out, place it in a cup of hot water, all without waking the dog. I am successful...I think. As I ascend the stairs, I begin to doubt. Did I mix the formula, or did I just do the water? I look at the bottle, and I can tell, I did add the formula, as it's not completely mixed in yet.
My ascent is complete and I walk back into the bedroom, set the bottle on the vanity, and turn on my nightstand lamp. Cy is awake and fully alert, fussing a bit, but not full-on crying; Jamie is sound asleep. I lift Cy out of his side of the pack and play-twin bassinet combo, place him on our bed, and remove his swaddle. Grabbing his heart and breathing monitor, I carry him to his room to change his diaper before the feeding.
I unbutton his onesie, and the leads from the monitor come loose, creating a fire-alarm sound that surprisingly awakens only my desire to swear, and everyone else stays asleep. After putting the leads back in place, I race to get his diaper changed before he pees on me. Alas, he has pooped, so this will take some time.
My exhaustion intensifies my frustration as he begins to pee and gets it all over his sleeping outfit. I find an outfit that swims on him, but it works. As I fasten the last snap, his leads come loose again, so I must undress him and fix the leads.
I carry him back to the bedroom, plug in the monitor, and sit down. I'm almost done. All I have to do is sit and wait while he downs this bottle. I struggle to stay awake. I question how I am going to do this when Dulcinea comes home and eats twice as slowly as he does. I question my loyalty, my ability, and my sanity.
Then, he opens his eyes.
Those wide dark eyes stare into mine. I find the energy to stay awake. All my doubts vanish. I stare back at him, and I am at peace. He quickly downs his bottle, I burp him, put him in his bassinet, and I go back to bed.
Then the damn leads come off again.
